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  • Katie Smith

Not crushing it

Sometime last year we had a zoom meeting with community group leaders from our church. The breakout sessions all began with an open-ended question: "How are you crushing it right now?"

At first, my husband and I had to ask for the question to be restated. We aren't the most media savvy couple, barely connecting socially, so we aren't always familiar with new "poppy" words and phrases that become household slang overnight. "Crushing it" came around about the same time as "kiddo" and "all the things." Easy ways to ask questions without sounding tiresome or fossilized.

Now we like to joke with each other and ask this question regularly, because to be honest, we aren't "crushing" anything . I’m NOT entirely sure we ever were. Living in an RV means everything fumbles and falls, bangs and busts. There's no, what the french call, je ne sais quoi. No grace, no finesse or poise that my ballerina background would like to have. It's tight, outdoor glamping. NO crushing it here.

Any parent will tell you the same truth. Just when you think you've done well, a new phase hits you like a smack on the head. However, we rehearsed a much more dramatic two-steps-forward, one-step-back, dance after our second son was born. Everytime we thought a prayer was answered for his recovery, a new issue was diagnosed. But like anyone who encounters a big bump in the road, you try to overcome it, so you can conquer it, and then continue "crushing" it.

Well....the theme of this new lifestyle seems to be "looking at things backwards." I thought "crushing" it meant I could you my God-given gifts to bless God. Killing multiple birds with a single stone comes to mind. However, NOT "crushing it" actually means God doesn’t have to crush me in order to get my attention. It is then that I demonstrate my human frailty. My lack and weakness remain ever-present, making His grace and omnipotence front and center.

It's easy to pat ourselves on the back and feel amazing when we crush the day, but when you're constantly failing, it's a different humility to still let God pat you on the back. When "all the things" that come along with my "kiddos" struggle and fail, when I am crushing nothing, when I make plans only to have the wind literally blow us in a different direction, it's much harder to maintain joy and confidence.

Still, "He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me" (2 Cor. 12:9). That kind of power is different than "crushing it" power. Instead, He's crushing it in me, and that's an incredible reality you have to experience. You can only experience it when you give up crushing it.

Last week we saw the power of God, who crushed His only son on the cross and make a way for us to have a new nearness to Him. God crushed death and sin so that I don't have to crush anything anymore. He crushed the lamb so that the lion could live. Then both lamb and lion could crush it within us.

The mess ups, frustrations, elbow to elbow, headstrong needs in our "home" mean we must ask God and each other for forgiveness much more than seventy-seven times a day. We see our need for grace and forgiveness every single day in this rig. It's a hard lesson in living, but it's exactly what we all need.

The people we love most we often crush the most. Thus, I'm grateful that the cross and empty tomb mean I can keep forgiving my loved ones, and pray they can keep forgiving me.

Here's to NOT crushing it.

~Not Crushing Anything Carefully or Carelessly

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