The Honeymoon is Over

"The term honeymoon comes from the idea that “the first month of marriage is the sweetest”, hence honey (sweet) and moon (referring to a calendar month). Back in the day (we're talking 5th century), the Babylonians would give the bride's father a month's worth of mead to ensure his daughter's happiness (and to make him forget how much he spent on the wedding). This month was called the "honey month," which eventually evolved into our beloved "honeymoon." (batchmead.com, Feb. 2024)

Now I'm not sure how reliable that source is, but the story makes sense. We've all felt the beloved bliss end after the novelty wears off. The honeymoon has to end at some point, even if you keep moving to new places with new people, the moving itself hinders the sweetness of the honey.

Each time we've struck out on a new adventure, we feel that giddy excitement, but after we've enjoyed the sweetness of new travel, the moon waxes and wanes enough times to become new, darkening the sky, along with our spirits. Imperfect people inevitably sour every experience with discord, disagreement, and discontentment, even if the surroundings are new and sweet.

How and why do we keep going in these "dark times?" To be transparent, it's hard. Traveling with four changing boys, with diverging preferences prone to argue and complain looks the same on any continent. It isn't just on travel days either, it isn't just when we are hungry or tired, although that adds to the sourness. It's any time. It's life. Despite the cool backgrounds in photos, life on the road isn't always bright and cheery, and we know we'd experience similar darkness if we lived in our own home day after day.

The difference is in the nuances, the little disruptions, the pesky annoyances that try to steal our joy and make us yearn for that which is familiar and comfortable. There's no pots or pans, the bathtub has bugs in it, there isn't any salt or pepper, the pillows are too hard or too soft, the wifi is too slow. The list goes on until we create so many negatives about a place that we begin looking for reasons to complain.

Once we start down this road it's like a mosquito bite; we think it feels better itching it, but it really only makes it worse. The itch spreads like wildfire even making other people feel itchy. The cure? Cut off the itch completely. Remind yourself that you could lose your arm, your family, or your own life in a matter of seconds. Recall how quickly your life changed in the past when you did lose someone, you did receive a diagnosis, or you heard about a life-altering tragedy that you couldn't fix.

When you learn to number your days correctly, you know longer see the petty inconveniences or frustrations. Instead you focus on the grace you were given today, and trust God will give you what you need to endure tomorrow.

"Our days may come to seventy years, or eighty, if our strength endures; yet the best of them are but trouble and sorrow, for they quickly pass, and we fly away." Psalm 90:10

Our daily minute by minute frustrations rattle us simply because we don't actually believe in the power within us. I ask people to pray for me when I'm too frustrated or negative to pray for myself, and I am always amazed at how quickly God hears and answers these prayers. But why am I surprised? "If we are faithless, he remains faithful, for he cannot disown himself. Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed." (2 Timothy 2:13, 1 Peter 4:12-13)

My faith is still small. I need to grow through these fractional frustrations inasmuch as the fiery ones. I need discomfort in order to comprehend God's goodness and glory. When we start praying and counting our blessings instead of complaining, we'll have moments that are sweeter than honey. "God's decrees are more precious than gold, than much pure gold; they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the honeycomb." (Psalm 19:10)

Even though we aren't as giddy as we were a few months ago, God is allowing us some of the sweetest moments to keep us going. After almost three months in Europe, we are excited that in another week we will head to the United Kingdom for the first time!

~Traveling Carefully & Carelessly